A Natural Woman

Melissa at the gym

This post is the first in a series on love affairs between Black women and their natural hair.  Meet Melissa, one of my workout buddies.

Melissa first went natural right after graduating from college in 1986.  “People thought I was disappointed about life after college, but I just didn’t do hair.”  Her sorority sisters kept her hair looking sharp while she was an undergrad. One made her hair swing with chemical relaxers, another was a wizard with scissors, a blow dryer and curling irons. 

When Melissa returned to her southern home town after college her mother said, “She done went to the white people’s school and lost her mind.”  Mom added, “We don’t want to look at your nappy head, you know white people don’t want to look at it either!”  Eventually she caved in to family pressure and straightened her hair.  Melissa then landed a job at a hotel and returned to chemical relaxers.  I’d bet that her co-workers and customers relaxed because she didn’t look like a revolutionary waiting to be televised.

She’s locking her hair now, and describes it is an individual journey with heaps of self-love. It’s a warm relationship between a woman, her hair, and her self-image.  As Melissa will tell you, “You can’t get away from yourself.” 

She admires Nina Simone and Maya Angelou with their striking African features and stunning natural style.  She talks about seeing black as a color of power, and how we need to reorient ourselves to that idea.  (Just think about judges wearing black robes.)  Black is also the color of elegance. (Just think of the LBD.)

Melissa wraps up our conversation about hair by saying, “Originally I cut it because I didn’t want to do anything [to it] but now thirty years later I have to decide what to do with it!”  Sounds like a fabulous challenge!

Skipping the salon also has a nice wallet fattening quality. She laughs and says, “I keep that $110 in my pocket.”